When your company makes a mistake, and a customer is on the receiving end, you generally have three choices:

1. You can acknowledge the mistake and course correct.

2. You can ignore it and hope the situation goes away.

3. You can downplay it with a lukewarm apology and hope that will suffice.

It should be clear that Choice 1 is the best way to go, yet so many organisations go with Choice 3, and not only issue a lukewarm apology, and usually the boiler-plated: “Apologies for any inconvenience caused.”

On the surface, that may seem to suffice, but it’s not really a meaningful apology, because it’s just too easy to say – and people who have been wronged are after action, not talk. Talk is cheap: rectifying the problem is not as easy. And in life, as in writing, it’s always better to show than to tell.

When people complain to a retailer or service provider, they’re looking for more than an expression of regret, especially when there’s no accountability built into that expression. “We’re sorry you had a bad experience” shows no accountability. In fact, it puts the blame on the customer. What people are looking for, is for you to apologise for your mistakes.

Getting an apology right can actually defuse the situation much more than hauling out these tired phrases and not being accountable for mistakes made. So here’s what a meaningful apology looks like:

1. It acknowledges that a mistake has been made – which means identifying what went wrong, and describing it. It should also acknowledge the effects on the person who complained.
2. It should accept that your organisation is responsible both for the mistake, and for the harm done.
3. It should clearly explain why the mistake happened, and demonstrate that it wasn’t personal, or intentional. And if you can’t give an explanation as to why it happened, then just say there is no excuse for what happened.
4. It should lay out the steps that you are taking so that it doesn’t happen again, as far as possible.
5. It should make amends – in other words, it should put things right.

And if it is a very serious error, apologising in writing may not be enough – it may require a personal visit from someone at the organisation.

Finally, ensure that you make the apology sooner rather than later. A delay can just make things worse, and may mean you lose the opportunity to damp things down before they escalate. Because wronged customers and clients these days will take to social media and do untold reputational damage if you leave things to fester.

So look at your customer complaints processes and scripts and put yourself in the shoes of your customers. If someone apologised like that to you, how would you feel or react? And then adjust your course of action accordingly.